sou kamoshiran

Maybe I am a strange kid.

There will always be failures in one's life. Those who achieve none for a single task will get an applause, and naturally, those who get many get laughed at. However, I want to believe that I am the sort of person who will see failures as stepping stones, and a unique experience no-one can experience. I wish to believe that the more the failures the stronger the person. I mean how strong must that person be to be laughed at, over and over again, yet be able to try and try again.

~~~~~

I am many things, yet I am not completely all how I desire to be.

Dear Readers of the 21st century,

In a society where there are more than just one world, where these worlds are not visible to the human eye, and can only be observed by our own actions and emotions; we as humans have a responsibility to do what humans do best. Learn.

In such a place with so much chaos happening around us. Truly, ignorance is bliss. But once that ignorance is lost, there is nothing we can do to regain it. Yes, it is scary. Like you can't believe, knowing chaos is scary. That is why we humans try to avoid the chance of learning. But that is stupid... as much as we might fear it, there are more greatness that come out of it.

Think about it. Love.

It applies to love in every way. No matter how many times you get rejected, you still want to do what you did right before you got rejected. You want to be with the person you like, even after being dumped, after a period of time, you want to feel that way again because it just felt that good.

I think, as people with this knowledge we cant let our minds sit in the pigsty it is in already. Get that pig to do some exercise. Strengthen your mind and heart. Know that it is scary to walk into worlds you do not know about, but it is much better than being scared.

~~~~~

I know...

~~~~~

We all walk at a certain speed. We all get lost. It isn't time to rage, embrace it as much as you humanly can - try to accept what you got, because there is very little much we can do about it but embrace it.

- YAWN- if it doesn't make sense, sorry

amai kamo

hmm since I don't sleep till about 1.30 anyways

I may as well get out some of the thoughts out.

Well I do think about random stuff people don't normally think about =]

So... ehh well why can't it be like the olden times. Things used to be simple.

We'd fight over land, fight over food and we'd fight for fun.

We'd use fists and whatever we were born with, ie. skin, bone etc.

You'd worry about when you next get to eat. Obesity was never a problem, and diseases were just sent from the heavens above.

In wars, and I can call them wars, they'd use swords, bows and shields. They'd fight with honour in armour they bought/won/got given.

Today we don't have time to fight against others. It isn't accepted to fight. But my guess is, that is because we are fighting against ourselves. The more we know the more we have to pick at. People are being diagnosed and treated with drugs, whereas back then they'd just chuck salt at you and say man up.

Everything that once was worked hard for is now taken for granted. I mean decent and fresh food turned into fast food - kept in freezers for goodness know how long.

Today, we fight for justice, we fight for reason that go beyond our petty foolishness, but to what end?

I have no point. There is no point.

I am not bashing modern society - of course not! dont be silly.

just that, well, just midnight ramblings =]

~~~~~~~

music: Jay'ed - Luv is...

I have been quite addicted to duets lately. Probably means something - who knows.

~~~~~~~

I know it isn't time to reflect on the year yet, but I think this year, I learnt more studies than about myself, relative to last year. Should have been the other way around but it seems this year I have been quite absorbed in the distractions life present to me. Rather than taking time to think things through, things just keep popping up. Constantly yelling for my attention. The result of this is that I cannot put enough mind into each.

The fast pace life-style of the modern world.

in the end.

I just want to "just man up" and tank everything that comes my way [mentally and emotionally of course] but I guess that isn't how it works.

procrastination

Eh well meant to be doing my assignment but being SUPER lazy...

or just getting distracted... hard.

So to counteract this distraction I am distracting myself by blogging instead =]

SO!!!

what is distracting me?

Well I was reading the latest chapters of fairy tale and One Piece. And I seriously cannot get enough of One Piece. To all you ppl you think it is gay.... YOU'RE GAY ^^| but honestly... if I read one piece any later I think I would not have given a poop about my finals until I finished it... it is just that good...

Umm I found a new anime I want to watch lols. I know someone doesnt approve BUT!! I am in control (H) I watched half an ep yesters because my comp was gay and then finished the ep today, and I think I am in love with the chara's voice bahaha

emm.. I have been using blackboard discussion like some people use facebook. Refreshing the page every so second until I get a reply. Only because my assignment is quite badly written and there are so many small misunderstanding that can arise because of the poor wording. There was no advice on how to tackle it and no word limit, giving us less of an indication of what to do.

Ehh... my day today.. I couldnt go squash cos the swim yesterday was so epic haha

aching all over and it felt quite good. only swam for an hour but I basically had the pool to myself, I mean for at least 20mins I was swimming alone. The bad thing is I cant use my arm properly when swimming, might need to wait it out a little longer or do something about it.

Strange though.. I can work hard when it comes to physical fitness but when it comes to study ^^| down the drain it goes. oh wells, I am a labourer's son afterall =P

~~~~~~

learning:

- [edit] no one shall ever know =P

[what was edited] - learning how to fly...

~~~~~~

man.. I have been trying to not 120% of my stomach capacity lately... but it is so hard when the food is so good... oh i have gained weight, but that isnt the the cause of me wanting to eat slightly less. normally I eat till i cant eat anymore, then end up sleepy... that is

1. not healthy

2. not productive

after dinner I am meant to be studying and getting through the stuff I gotta do BUT! I end up drowsy on the couch watching whatever my parents/brothers are watching.

Thus, the reason. I heard after a meal you are meant to feel light, relaxed and [most importantly] awake. Not hungry but not overflowing with food in the stomach. I guess I am not a growing boy in the sense of height any more, so gotta look after myself ;]

~~~~~~

That's all for now yeeeeeea' boy (8) - Clara C hahaha

The inner nerd of us all =]

ひさしー。

been a while since I blogged [not that anyone cares ;]

ok, down to the dirty and gritty, it is spring and almost summer. To be honest I don't like the two very much =P I mean there is insects and the heat to beat. And being a major donor of blood to the mossies and the heat is quite tiring [but good for burning the fat ;] I wouldn't have much energy to do much.

HOWEVER, in the shower I thought I might be more positive this summer or heat period. I mean there are plenty of good stuff to experience in the summer right?

~~~~~~

I remember in primary school, we'd knock off at 3 and get home at 3.30. It was 38 degrees and everyone was quite beaten by the temperature. Even the air-conditioners called out to be saved, rattling away trying to keep the people cool. Out of the car I got and rushed inside to find a slightly cooler living room, but it wasn't enough. I quickly jumped into the shower and slowly turned the cold water on. Under the shower head, I could feel the heat slowly dissipating from my dark black hair. At first the water trickling to my fingers were warm, then slowly as I turned to tap further, my skin was in a cold heaven. I stuck out my tongue and let the water fall almost gluttonously drinking the water. As the cool water slid down my throat I no longer was in this world of heat. Gone.

~~~~~~

Ok let's get to what I wanted to do =P [referring to the title <- just for fun] primary school was about 7 years ago, and global warming had not hit us as much as it is now. so 38 degrees is pretty hot relative to the winter the normal temp then. So at 38 degrees our body is desperately trying to cool our body down, with sweat. This sweat will evaporate utilizing what is known as the "cooling effect". So in order to produce this sweat our bodies must use up energy, and as we move about as well we use up energy so, thus, people would be tired because of the heat. Air conditioners were pretty crap back then, and we haven't changed them since so they are pretty old, hence the rattling noises. HOWEVER, obviously an inanimate object cannot be "crying out to be saved" thus, it must be one of those... those .. what do you call it? english technique.. onomatopoeia!

Well the slightly cooler living room is thanks to the insulation of the house, and the roof. At peak heat [about noon] the gutters play a important roll reducing heat in the summer. As we all know that the earth Rotates at a 23 degrees axis, in summer the sun is approximately 23 degrees at noon. So the gutter is able to block the most direct rays reducing the heat trapped inside by 40%, insulation keeps the morning coolness inside the house and reflects the heat out. However, ventilation like windows and pipes allow heat to flow into the house, resulting in a slightly cooler room.

Turning the tap slowly and allowing the water to trickle does not have any affect. It is pointless =P As we know the colour black is a good absorber of heat, the heat on the hair is greater then the surface temperature of the skin. As the cold water falls onto the hair the heat from the hair is transferred to the water [zeroth law of thermodynamics]. The sensory neurons at our fingers have the ability to sense temperature [as well as pressure etc] at the sensory neurons small electrical signals are sent to from the synapses to the central nervous system and then sent to the brain. This allows up to perceive what we know as cold. Together with the first point we now can conclude that what I was feeling is true, proven by science. Similarly, by drinking cold water the heat is transferred from the point of contact to the water and as the water has kinetic energy we can see that the heat is no longer at the point in contact.

The rest of it is a load of BS =]

~~~~~~~~~~

lol ^^|

fun? or fun?

Thus, the title of this blog =D

We smile

, be brave and put on that smile, holding back on words that would never come out right and walk. Walk forward to what may never seem like reality. We take each day without realising much. Taken for granted, the day just passes, as we distract ourselves from what is true. Some say reality and truth hurts; some say reality and truth is what we decide it to be; others... well the others are too ignorant [or busy] to care.

We are all these, and yet none. How can something as arbitrary as this be so definite?

~~~~~~~~

ZZzzzzzzZZZZzzzzzzZZ

yet no ZZZZZ

ZZZzzzzZZzzzZZZZzzzzZZzzzzzZZZZzzz

These hands...

Don't look at these hands.

These labourer's hands...

They have been stains with blood, sweat and pain.

They have brought happiness, stress and hardship.

They have been punished for my silly thoughts, my anger and stupidity.

These hands are my history that tell you what I cannot tell you myself.

These hands do not lie, like I wish to. After all, there is no point in making others worry when nothing can be done.

My pain is my own, and if there were times I could share the load - I will.

My hands will prove to you how mature I have become.

My hands hopefully with convince you to trust in me.

So trust in these hands, and walk forward with me - to something we all hope is good.

~~~~~

Imagine you were a never ageing 18 year old. You have gotten over all your hormones and what not [sure if you wish you could revisit your hormones but this is not the point...] Anywho, you are not going to die unless you get killed 10 billion times or something. Ok you some how appeared right after the dinosaurs have disappeared. The only human on the planet until you wait for humans to evolve from Neanderthals.

Now think about the climate. It is the ice age at which the dinosaurs have just died from [lots of food kept cool from rot =P] and then you get the stage flicking to and from ice ages. Then it steadies within the next 50 million years. Slowly you get relatively warm and get averages. humans start to think "productively" and then before you know it the industrial revolution starts. Imagine the types of people you would have met up to this point.

Vikings, Pharaohs, geniuses, the commoners, the sick, the rich. Imagine you have knowledge of them all - their culture and everything about their society. Then the industrial rev. Within another 250 years we are in the present. Today. Right now.

With at least 200 billion years of knowledge. What do you think will happen in the next 100 years. In the next 1000 years and the next million or even 200 billion years?

Don't know about you, but I reckon humans might not be here in the next 3000 years. Humans have been around for at least 4000 years now right? In the past 300 years we have become most populated, and most destructive of our 4000 or so years of existence. [humans as in those that wear clothes and what not.] At the rate we are going I'd give it 500 years before things get really bad and wooh! nature is saved!

Well it doesn't matter. We won't live to see this happen to us right? Wrong - you don't die and forever 18. =]

This wasn't meant to make you sad or what not. Just don't lose sight of the bigger picture - because everyone needs a reminder once in a while.

~~~~~

going to be busy for the next billion years [trying to save man kind =P] so see you next time i have less hw than expected or trying to procrastinate =]

Are you a-maze-d?

For those bored beings out there that has internet, no study to do, and not HD to aim for [not really] youtube Sungha Jung. I don't exactly know his background, but he is... so talented.. I can only wish to be that talented in a billion years. As long as I don't get arthritis and too old =]

~~~~

Something sort of outraged me the other day.

Firstly, do YOU believe in the idea of climate change? Have YOU challenged this notion of climate change? Eh.. well in my lecture we watched a video about the fact that climate change ie. global warming is false and does not exist. By the end of it I was feeling quite sick.. strangely. Why? It isn't because I really believe in climate change but because I could pick out a flaw in almost all of their points they put forward.. The manipulation of information...

Now that I think about it.. it quite reminds me of myself ^^| You probably question why, and it is something that shall stay unanswered till I find an answer myself.

Any who, there was some "scientific" information and results saying that the stratosphere should be warmer than the surface of the Earth but results show otherwise. I couldn't say anything about it. There was only two ways you could determine those results, satellite and balloon. So someone can try convince me - but note I am not one to be persuaded until I find out myself.

- Well throughout the video, it only seemed to be two sides. Those that firmly believe in global warming, and those that firmly do not. I want to tell those who are ready to jump at each other's throats to slow down and calm down... clearly this has been brought up before but both sides of these extreme views have shunned the "fence sitter".

# my view #

In all honestly, I couldn't be too bothered about the technicalities. I want my children, and my children's children and the children of the future to experience the beauties of what this world can show us. Over these 18 years I have seen wondrous things, and I can already see some disappearing. I want to see blue sky where ever I go when I am old and even more wrinkly.

I don't see any reason not to reduce the amount of carbon used. It only causes pollution. It provides electricity but so can greener forms. It'll use up a lot of infrastructure but think about the benefits of doing this.

Also, eventually - sooner or later - fossil fuels will disappear and then what? We are screwed. We end up fighting with swords ... no not even sticks and stones. [no fire to make swords =P or is there?? O____o]

~~~~

nande itsu are ga mietara kimochi ga warui ni naru...

shinji arenai kamoshiranai

hayai sugiru kamoshiranai

sona koto zen zen wakanai ka?

nande imin ga wakanai?

~~~~

It isn't like walking up a mountain - where your legs burn but you continue and don't stop.

It isn't like a marathon - where breathing hurts and your head is light headed

It isn't like drowning - where gasping for breath only cough and instincts tell you to run.

It is like sitting high up and landing on your head.

Like the numbness of the pain - though you know you hurt something precious

It is the involuntary skip of the heart - causing you to gasp for air.

Like the cramps of chest muscles making it hard to gasp and no matter up much you breath the heart will not slow down.

It is like the dizziness when you run so much and so suddenly that you are not only light headed, but need to throw up.

It is like constantly working hard but not getting anywhere - and you don't feel deserving to complain because you know there are others worse off, and if not, there were people worse off.

But you can't help but feel strangely helpless.

You pick yourself up again, dust yourself off and continue for the [some number]th time.

"It isn't as bad really, it could be worse, it'll be ok."

~~~~~

Hahaha cryptic msg after cryptic msg. I guess it is late and you know who comes out at this hour? ReNu my arch-enemy. We have fought many battles before, but it seems he has been quite over powering lately. Once I chopped him up and chucked him in the pan... I ate him and then 12 hrs later he came walking through the door completely fine - ready to fight. That day I post poned the fight till I completely digested.

- yes it is all just blabber and doesn't make sense.

1.11 - [as least it was] I wish my arm would bloody stay put so I can punch my sofa into pieces.

~~~~~

Clouded by your beauty I sit there stunned by what is in front of me. I search through my memory to see your smile again. I sit there in the corner searching when I realise, it isn't your smile I am looking for... but for my own. You were always smiling.

~~~~~

yokatara... kotoshi mo, kore kara mo, zutto itsudemo... yoroshiku tanomu.

uphill or downhill?

Imagine something so beautiful. A painting of some sort... the original is too your left, and the duplicate is on your right. You can tell which one is which. Which side do you choose to look at?

What if there were obstacles that prevent you from seeing the whole original painting? Would you look at the whole of the duplicate or do you look at parts of the original?

In this instance you cant move towards the painting because you are moving forward. Not by choice, but because you are in a vehicle... ok this isn't going to make sense to anyone so =] yamemasu.

~~~~

tsu... ka... re... ta.

I don't even feel lazy. Though I do feel like my efforts are useless. I guess the end results do matter most.

and so... ZZzzzzZzzzz

~~~~

riddle that I forgot earlier today.

I have forgotten my bank pin number - but I won't ever forget because it is associated with the children's song/game "Head, shoulders, knees and toes". The Pin number is 4 numbers long. What is my pin number.

~~~~

To be honest it is quite similar to the riddle's that have been going around lately. ie. why 4 is cosmic and how many horses are there?

-----


distraction... distraction distraction. I think it is not working. I can take the other approach, but... but yeah ^^

oyasumi iromono

anta he,

ehhh.... my toes have taken a bashing today hahah. I don't think they are bruised yet ;] my toes have been conditioned so it is ok ;P lols from being stepped on to kicking stuff and having the vacuum crush them. it is invincible =P

~~~~~~

What do you value? What do you really value? From your answer I shall decide if you are selfish or understandingly selfish. I am unsure if you understand the situation you are in. Despite this, you will find out in due time. From what I see and have noted, your time will come soon, but you will not learn. I can act but I do not wish to, or, I do not feel I should. You may have fooled everyone, or you may have fooled me, but I will be, and am not, sitting there doing nothing. You might think you are clear - but I am watching you.

This is a warning. If you hurt that that I value. I will not hold back, and I will not care for the consequences.

I do think of the consequences, and they do frighten me a little, but when the time comes I will not give a pigs poop. I cannot think of any other way I can approach this situation. As long as you do not hurt or burden what I value - I will only sit back and be cautious.

To no-one.

~~~~~~

What I have ticked off the list earlier, in June.

- guitar

- camp

- draw

- visit japan [in my head]

- see thomas

- play a little bit of games

- read manga

- watch K-on!

- watch my boss my hero

- watch anime

- go to Adam's, David's and Thomas's [and maybe Hanson's house] (alphabetical order)

- run around like a crazy man [sorta]

- eat lots and lots and lots .... and lots.

- clean my clothes for the next sem [it might look new if I do]

- see friends and eat friends - they were yummy =]

- [not yet] clean up desk and room - but I have cleaned the house twice on my own.. and then was too tired to clean everything else ^^|

That is 16/23 however, 4 of the original were duds. so 16/19 - not bad. though did most of it in the first 2 weeks haha. and watched anime in the last 2 =P

How to save the world

It was meant to be recorded, however, I got lazy so imagine if an even more retarded Hanson you know, was speaking. Enjoy.

~~~~~~

Good morning, afternoon and evening, ladies and gentlemen, gentlemen and ladies. Today I speak of a controversial topic that no one person has dared to tackle head on. Here I stand before as a human being who will attempt to break the barrier between men/women from talking about this topic. We human beings are magnificent creatures. However, we are not only constructive species but also a destructive species. So as the dominant and most destructive inhabitants on this planet we have a responsibility to save our habitat.

Are you thinking “Save the world? Nothing I can do – so it is pointless”” Think again. You don’t have to recycle; you don’t even need to get off that big furry ass. You don’t have to do much more than what you do already. All you need to do is... eat!

Firstly, eat everything on your plate. Why? Well you are optimising the amount of food relative to the amount you pay. Next you are not as full as you think you are. The food you leave on the plate in food that is thrown out into the bin. Neglected… you know how it feels neglected, so do the food justice and eat it. There are starving people around the world. Not just in Australia, not just in china and not just in Africa. There are starving people everywhere. I stand here before you as a fellow starving human being. So don’t eat for Australia’s sake, don’t eat for Africa’s sake but eat for MY sake.

Next, the more frequent you eat not only does it benefit you, but also benefits the world. It benefits you by increasing your metabolism. By eating more frequent [note: frequent ≠ more food] your metabolism increases at an exponential rate. Considering it has been 18 years and my metabolism rate is 12hrs, in 100 000 years yours will be a few seconds long… hmmm that would be expensive… but no worries in 100 000 years’ time you will be dead so it’s ok. High metabolism rate means you lose fat quicker.

The economical crisis, the great depression and my empty wallet. All great tragedies… All that occurred due to the notion of money. I personally prefer bartering however, society says no. how eating food would save the world would be that it boosts the economy. By spending more, the dollar will go up and the price of food will go down. It is like buying two cakes with $1!! The economical crises would not have occurred if there was a constant demand for supply. Thus, the price drop will allow my wallet to fill up again =]

In summary, eat all your food – not for the starving kids, not because your parents tell you to, but for me. Next, by eating constantly [a reasonable amount at a time] your metabolism rate will increase and there just might be more attractive people everywhere. And lastly, if you eat more food will be cheaper, which means I have more money, THUS! I can spend more money on food! =]

Alright seriously… this how to save the world – your world. If you are full you are happy. if everyone is happy … then… everyone is happy. You + happy = thumbs up.

Thank you =]

まいっか

I have always been made to work hard to get the things that most people get easy.

~~~~~

I think I was upside down for too long. All that blood rushed to my head... I am light headed atm ha!

~~~~~

I guess I have a story to tell me children then.

Maybe I am attracted to hardship, I like to feel pain and suffering to look good. But I think, mostly so that I can help ... guide others in times of hardship. あまい。。しってるけど。It is that point in time when you are too tired to even be angry or sad. maiika.

My right arm is weaker than my left arm now.. how shameful...

やぱ子供な

だれでも聞くない。子供からな。

~~~~~

grown out of those socks too quickly.

Should I wait for the socks to fit me, or should I fit me into the socks?

That is the question.

~~~~~

DUMMMM duuuumm dummm!!!! <- guitar strums

inochi ga saiko!

hmm... I think I know why I like bruises. Ok let's take a step back and I'll explain. Do you know the feeling you get when you do exercise or something and your muscles ache for the next say.. 3 days? I like that feeling too =] Well everyone knows that when you exercise you release happy endorphins [correct me if I am wrong], so, naturally I would like doing exercise. However, for me not only do I like sports but I like the aching as well. It is a little bit of psychology that Nick taught me. Something about connections or rather. Anywho, when my muscles ache it reminds me of the endorphins and make me happy -> and when I ache [ie. bruises] it makes me happy too.

~ or you can just say I like to feel pain >=]

~~~~~

Any who, I have a big announcement. I finally got one set from my dad in squash. I think we played about 12 games each haha my brother came and completely thrashed him >=] mm I think my days disappeared like that...

~~~~~

" I have learnt many things because of my past, because what is happening, and because what will happen. There is no point in the story, but there is a meaning in each line. 'Take your time' is one of them - it is now that you truly enjoy and appreciate life before a new one comes. "

buggered.... -_________-

and yet I am able to write this.

Well ladies and zentlemen. I am.. buggered.

The End...

jitsu wa... tsukareta...

~~~~

It has been a long time since I last stepped onto the battlefield. It was nice while the peace lasted... but everyone knew that war was inevitable. The treaty for peace was voided the moment the time has passed. War was never pretty... but this time it was unimaginably ugly... after weeks or even months of peace the war was about to begin.

It was late in the morning, getting close to afternoon before the enemy lines were raided. It was a do or die situation. If the raid was not done, we would have... perished. The plans were quite mixed and very unorthodox. A new general was directing the troops to victory. This is the only war that can be won. The raid was successful, and the largest enemy base was cleaned. There was still enemies hiding, so it was necessary to get the rag, soap and water out - the three elements.

1 hour after midday: the largest area has become our territory. There was still the dining, study, the legendary three bedrooms and the frightfully horrible kitchen... There was no time to lose.

Everything moved out of the way, as the heavy machine sucked all specks of dust and dirty and what not, visible to the human eye. . The powerful tool, eliminated the enemies everywhere. Once again to officially conquer the land the three elements were called.

After a long tiring 3 hours, the ground forces were conquered. There were yet the naval and the air to capture. So the troops were sent to get rid of all that gets in my way.

And thus, 4 hours past after the beginning of it all. The floor was sparkling clean, dishes washed, laundry dried...

- titled: The Cleaning War

Not a matter of black or white

Firstly i want to apologise <- i can never spell it the right way the first time =="
apologise about the cbox, it has disappeared into the bottom of the ocean. An ocean of words =P

~~~~~~

I think feminists and malists [if there is such a thing] got it wrong. Horribly wrong. Males and females, or females and males [for you pro female], as genders looking at how "powerful" they are they both are low. None are more powerful than the other, none are any better than each other. We are humans. Not, we are both humans - as in "because we are both humans we are equal". Humans are horrible, despicable creatures; capable of great, even frightfully great amounts of things. I mean humans can achieve lovely things, productive and even helpful things, but it is the amount of horrible things that will never be able to be balanced by the good things. <- that however is a different topic ;]

As I said humans, as individual genders, yes we are equal, but nothing to be proud about because we are low. However, IF the genders "work together" - how cliché - then the question to the 'gender' battle to see who is more powerful, is answered. It is the relationship between the two that matters. There is always a struggle between who do what amount of work. See if there were understanding between both parties, it wouldn't matter what amount of work is done by each, it is because they act as one unit.

Ok example. Washing dishes. Many couples argue who should do the dishes. Saying "I did it last night, you do it tonight ok?" and sometimes the answer is "yes sounds reasonable i'll do it tonight as long as you do it tomorrow night." This is the easy answer. Sure this works and every is "happy" but... ~ ok you must be thinking Hanson WTH are you on about this works! What more is there? They aren't fighting right? All is fine right? ~ my answer is no.

Even if they were fighting, they still don't see that there are dishes to do. No matter what happens, someone has to do them. They forget to take a breath, step back and look at the bigger picture. The fact is that the dishes isn't their only problem. It is work, cleaning the house, washing the clothes, making food and even who holds the control to the tv. What I am TRYING to say is that there is work to do, so stop fighting over petty things and do it.

But the question was WHO does it!??!?

Firstly, why does it matter? BECAUSE.... because I am busy too. But so is he/she - it does not take long to do it. [ok this can go on forever if I do this] but who does it really is up to you and the other person/people. Understanding. If all parties have understanding, there will be no question of this. This is the basic knowledge for parents - but they lose it once the rules change. The parents must wash the dishes because the children cannot. Right?

If other people were busy for some reason, and you are free wouldn't it be right for you to do it? However, people have too much pride and are too lazy so they use more effort to pick a fight so that other busy person/people do the work. If one person is free go do it. If others are not [relative to you, of course] then you do it. WHY?!? Why not?

This is how life should be... this is how this life... lifestyle should be.

Though there is a power struggle between females and males, the answer to it is not making females better than males. The answer is making both parties understand. You have no idea how much understanding goes. So please understand =]

~~~~~~

That being said. I want to tell everyone esp. my close friends thank you. By just being there/here/where I have learnt a lot and have understood many things about people and myself.

Also, I don't care what you say - who YOU marry is of importance to me!! Why? because when I get married how is my wife meant to talk to your wife if she horrible, and how am I meant to talk to your husband if I cannot communicate to him? SO!! please!! choose wisely, thoughtfully. There is nothing more important than choosing who you are with. Why? because they are an influence on you, on your children and those around you. AND!!! IF YOU CHOOSE SOMEONE CRAP and it is someone who doesn't like me... it means I don't get to see you =(

understand!?!?

~~~~~~

Ps. I am working on a speech I wish to voice out =] Well I can imagine that I would speak it. Because: 1 I don't have the courage to say it in front of many people =P

2: you might kick me off my podium 1mins after I start =] hehe but I do wish I could say it out loud.

Cos it is an important topic, and it is 100% Hanson "lame"

Till next time.

Ps. I have checked off 2 of things off my list for things to do. And tonight Another 2 things will disappear =]

that's how the cookie crumbles

We have a greater sense of responsibility to other rather than family.

or

we believe each other so much we believe that without their help we'll be fine and be able to do it.

or

they really dont have time to help.. so why are they sitting there watching tv

or

maybe they are so ignorant about some stuff they dont see the picture at all. They say look at the big picture, but you need to look at the picture in the first place.

or

... I cant think of any more positive/optimistic statements
it is just pushing me away

a few days ago, I re-thought over my thoughts, and considered not to go ahead with it, because without me no one... will help my parents.
[ps. i promised people i will not be disappearing any time soon SO!!!! I am not going to die. Even if aliens abduct me i will return to earth and get me a pretty girl. Even if i get hit by a truck i will not die until i get a pretty nurse. Even if i lose in my ninja/samurai battle... I will not lose unless it is a pretty girl.... you got the point =] I promise]

I ... I dont know what it is.. I dont have enough courage? I dont have enough anger? I dont .. why... i have been more than patient. I really dont understand. They have even readjusted themselves to suit "them", when "they" dont deserve it.

to be called lazy... no. That pushed it. unhappy about being called lazy? <- how stupid. you have called yourself lazy many times before, why start now? [you ask]
omaera touzen wakanai kara, damare.

It isnt fair to call them lazy because... compared to me and definitely to "them" they arent lazy at all. I dont understand why i had to start trying during the exams period. maybe because help left before exam period. because during exam period "they" have excuses. but "they" really dont understand.

I say this as if i understand. I am sure i dont understand, but i understand more than them.



bhavya where is my punching bag you were meant to get me half a year ago T_________T


~~~~~~


4 hrs to study computing. or shall i sleep less and study more. I think i shall study more and sleep MUCH less.

poof

The next four days are gonna be tough.


Are you ready?


for less sleep? less food?


No time to stop... ready or not, you gotta load your rifle aim and shoot.

124

last post was 123th post

Well.. Let's see.

Why am I up? To tire myself so i can sleep

Why can't I sleep? I studied... and for some reason I can only study properly at night - in the garage making funny noises and singing to myself or humming a out of tune random song.

Mmm well studies are going pretty smoothly for maths =P there is physics and computing i ought to think about. One at a time? The fact that I am leaving myself 1 day to study physics is stupid. So I have started learning and going through some phys before.. but I am not loving it as much as I am loving calculus [atm].

Well it got to the point where, there was no time to stress. Be it relaxing and forgetting stressful emotions or study and forget stress cos you're concentrating. Stress is just a load of poop. What use does it do? So despite not studying for a large portion or my morning, even after waking up at 8, productivity is the key.

Productively work, productively eat, productively play.

~~~~~~

Question: Do you guys remember what you were feeling at the end of year 11? And throughout yr 12?

I do.. I remember how intense it was [relatively]. And how lost everyone has become to you. How it was only you sticking up for yourself - because 1. no one could help you 2. everyone was too busy to think of a way to help you

It was THIS after THIS after THIS. I guess uni is similar except - you work on your own terms. Depending on your course you are restricted to how far your "terms" can go but nevertheless, you still want to fit more into your already busy timetable.

- it is late and I have no idea what I am on about =P

~~~~~

Well what did I achieve today?

I went lemon hunting [seriously...] I got a looooonnng stick and smacked the lemon tree a little and, as if falling from the gods, golden lemons dropped and rolled by my feet.

I re-did 2 past papers [that I spent 2 days on]

I did a test paper under time conditions and became ecstatic at how far I have come within a matter of a week.

I had a picnic with my family [on out lawn, sitting on some chairs staring at the garden, in the sun, with the colours of green and blue contrasting each other]

~~~~~

I'll back onto this after exams but..

I wish I could tell you, show you, what it is that I am feeling. It isn't easy to describe, but put trust in the two feet you stand on and hold firmly onto what you believe in with your two arms and walk towards your goals. It's okay. It'll be all okay.

~~~~~

music me!!! <-----------<<<
music arrow that is music-ing me to death

fingers cold

Life as a warrior:

I have to be strong. How else will I be able to face the ones I want to protect when I cannot with stand minor injuries, when I cannot do minor tasks? It has been a while since I was last hurt. This world has been quite peaceful after the feud. The need for me has become something of a desire rather than a necessity. My senses are not as sharp as before. However, the instincts are still all there.

Yes, I got injured today. Minor compared to those I got in the feud. My mind tells me to run, however, my body stood still, and continued. This mind has become weak. Adapting to a life without injuries... My mind spoke "Thank goodness it is cold and your skin felt numb. Otherwise you would have felt real pain." Blood gushed out and it watched curiously as if it has never seen such a thing before.

Intriguing.

This life without need for my swords and armour. It truly is intriguing...

Study = Crazy mind

"There are many worlds out there. Not just in a physical and quantum sense, but also a mental and different dimension sense. Quantum physics tells us that there is a very high, if not definite, chance that there are different worlds. There is a sense of time, in which a second before is a different world to "now" and different to one second later.

There are many examples in which we use apply a sense of different worlds when we say "society". Music society, japanese society, commerce society etc. These are different worlds.

Worlds inside of worlds inside of worlds.

World, ie. Earth, world, ie a country compared to another, world, inside that country etc.

There is one more... There is a world in our own heads. We perceive everything slightly or completely different to others. "All is one, one is all" [familiar?? =P ] We, each person, are a different world ourselves, however, we are what makes up THIS world, society, and these societies make up the Earth and what you perceive it as Earth.

definition of world: http://www.google.com.au/search?hl=en&source=hp&q=define:+world&aq=f&aqi=g1g-s1g8&aql=&oq=&gs_rfai=

As you can see, like many words, world has many definitions. <- hohoho

- said enough -

~~~~~~

I feel like an old man... Every exam period I turn into a blob. Always tired, always hungry/eating and if I could I would slide around the house like a snake. My life is guided by tests. <- hohoho

I think I have found my idol haha. Dr Karl Kruszelnicki... I have my reasons. Reminds me of someone I have met before... well a few people. =]

~~~~~

To do [after exams.. T___T If I survive]:

- guitar

- piano

- camp

- draw

- plan jap and korea trip.

- tell parents about jap and korea trip T___T

- not die from telling parents cos mum is planning shang hai trip soon... =S

- not die from uncle making me go over to shang hai

- visit japan [in my head]

- see thomas

- mega buff up [for the ladies] *hyuu*

- play a little bit of games

- read manga

- watch K-on!

- watch my boss my hero

- watch anime

- go to Adam's, David's and Thomas's [and maybe Hanson's house] (alphabetical order)

- run around like a crazy man

- eat lots and lots and lots .... and lots.

- clean my clothes for the next sem [it might look new if I do]

- see friends and eat friends.. I mean SEE FrI3nD5 <- just to distract you =]

- de blah! like.. I better! otherwise I am gonna explode and there shall be no more YOU.

- crash the warehouse with a forklift

- clean up desk and room ^^| <- it is embarrassing to even think about how much I need to clean up.

4 weeks to do all this (Y)

I am a greedy boy =] I want so much. Though it isn't the typical things... it is still quite a lot of things. Lazy and greedy. That's me =]

[What a horrible world my mind lives in. If it weren't for the true would to save me from myself... what a different life I would have led.

Engrave this knowledge into my brain because starting over is too painful. ]

Close your eyes

Lose yourself in the melody.

Hear the note vibrate in your ears, feel the piano at your fingertips. Let the violins bring you from the edge of insanity to a place your heart feels content.

It is never too late to lose yourself in music.

~~~~

The war has been hard on everyone. For many their lives will stop at that point in time. Let me take your hand, and take you away from this place you call home. Take a quicker step, and leap out of your monotone pace. Don't pause, just follow me.

To a distant place you have never, in your wildest dream, would have thought of going. The clouds so white, the sky so blue, come and run with me in the fields of wonders.

-

Don't be scared, I am here for you.

-

Come on, let's go, without a moment to wait, taking small steps and then strides. I am here for you, so follow.

In step we'll walk towards the future, to the land we will never believe will come true.

--------

And so they walked towards the path of which bright them light and warmth. You can hear their footsteps still echo in the halls of greatness and wonders.

~~~

Ehehe... This isn't just random.. ok maybe it is random but it is good. I am, as minch chau might put it, having an ear"gasm" right now hahaha.

My heart is pumping with music, the notes, the echoes. I reckon... IF my ears could walk, they would be flying away right now. Towards the melodies, and chasing the sounds that stole my ears.

lololol =]

Faaaaaaaannnnnttaassstic ;]

looks like this title has been used before

Girls... you don't know what you do to me. *slobber* .... *wakes up and slurps slobber*

~~~~

I feel so lazy T___T or tired... so much to do.. so little my brain can handle. Thinking about it just makes me stress/go crazy. But no worries, I will eat the cake one bite at a time =] I wish I am able to buy two cakes with 1 dollar. bahaha

Ok toodles friends.

~~~~

caught you

woha..

I feel like I have felt this before. Yes... this feeling is like something that has happened before. But why? The question really is when... How could this speak truth when it is a dream? Is it possible to have felt this in a dream before as well?? But why? I heard dreams mean something.. what could this mean? I know eventually I will feel this way one day, but when that day comes I will try to be stronger. Over time I will be more understanding.

~~~~

I am unsure. What do I say? What do I do? I wish you could hear my thoughts, and understand. But there is too much happening at the moment, so I do not wish to force that on you... So I keep them in the dark. My emotions and thoughts, stop at a stand still. I am sorry I am so useless. But I will do what I can. Tell me and I'll do it. Say so and it'll be done.

~~~~

I understand... not only do my memories tell me that I have been through it, but my dreams tell me I have. Many times over and over again. Many times I have suffered and stayed put. There is a possibility that I gave up once [in my dreams of course] but it didn't end pretty. That is why... That's why I will not give up. Not on myself, and not on you. That is why YOU must not give up.

To be honest it seems I dream when I am asleep... very little do I get pure sleep without dreaming, probably why my body feels weak, but I can't help this. I see many things in these dreams, and most of the time I remember one or two of them, but I tell you there are more than that...

My point is, I feel like I have seen almost all points of views from many situations. Laying everything on the table, I have killed someone, I have saved someone, I have lost someone. I am not saying I know everything, far from it... But I am saying I understand. Do not believe me as you wish, but I feel it some how. There may be explanations but no one, even me, will believe it easily.

That aside. I am here. I am not going anywhere any time soon. So don't give up just yet. There are answers to your questions. There are solutions to your problems. But all without trying hard is impossible. So don't give up.

~~~~

Sunshine lollipops and, rainbows....

holding onto the hands that belong to the people I care so much for, I let go for a second and watch them dance in the light, so magnificently. The sweat and dew sparkle in the lights, giving life not only to the surroundings but also to my cold heavy heart. It's warm now. I'll hold on tighter next time... if there is a next time. Please take care of yourself. I'll meet you soon.

crouching in the shadows

Why do you sit there? The floor is dirty...

Curled up into a ball, what are you afraid of? Are you not cold? Such a small frame, curled up in the shadows, hiding from the world. You cover your face, your eyes, your tears; but you don't fool me. I am blind at the moment, but I still know you are reaching out. You are lonely, tired and scared. People walk past you, as if it were normal, as if you are insignificant - and you feel insignificant.

If only... if only I had the courage, the strength.. the strength to lend out my hand and support you. But I... even I am reaching out for a hand. However, the thought has crossed my mind, maybe together this world won't seem so crazy. Maybe... no. I will be stronger, I will be stable. I will be your rock.

So don't hide any more. My hands aren't reaching for you, my arms are calling for you and let them warm your heart. Tears are reserved for the dead and happiness. Now... now there is nothing to fear. Stand up on your two feet and be MY rock when I falter.

To... my pet rock.

~~~~

Victim of the media, no casualty of the media. I wish not to walk that path. This is exactly what they want people to do. I never actually thought it would work.

~~~~

"So one day I walked down my street and I get called racist names by the neighbour hood kids. Any fool and beat them up, they are probably 5-8 years younger than me. But it takes someone special to smile and walk away, without feeling bad. "

- Don't lose sight of what is important.

sawaruna

sonani daijimono omouna. anta wa itsumo sono youna iru kara, sonani taihenna sekai dewa nai. itsumo dare demo ahou mitai ni naru kara, mou yametekureyo. hitori de susumu ja iinja. mou anta nokoto dameda, ore no genaki da. kimi nokoto mitometanai kara, kokode kiero kure.

~~~~

Strange. Today I didn't bring my glasses to uni - not the strange part - when I look at people and other things everything is quite blurry. However, I look at the sky and it doesn't seem to have changed much even with glasses on. Maybe a little more clarity but that is pretty much it. The edges and colours and .. lols they seem the same.

And at night my eye sight gets so bad it is impossible to look at anyone. And yes.. I went through the physics of it.. Since it is dark, the light is insufficient to reflect the light from the surfaces into my eyeballs reducing quality of image. As seeing is dependant on light being reflected into the iris or whatever the receptor cells are, being night, the lack of lights will cause your eye sight seem less proficient.

I should be an optometrist :L I don't think anyone would trust me with their eyes.. I don't trust myself with my eyes haha

-----

nanimo attakara, nanimo kawarani hazu dakedo... nanimo attanani nanka nanika kawareta.

-----

my love for food has rekindled. PLEASE BE CHEAP!!! =D

ps. i am sure there was something i wanted to write.. but i either cant think of it, or think it is appropriate ;]

mm...

He stood at the round about, turning, looking at each stretch.

The 4 roads that cars, motor bikes and buses take.

The 8 pathways for the bikes 2 in each lane.

and the 8 side walks for pedestrians.

Turning. Turning... not knowing what exactly differs from each, but knowing that which ever stretch he chooses will lead to a different area. He can't go back, because he doesn't know how he got there. He can't be guided by those who pass by because they don't understand him. One question normal people would ask is "Which way is the best way?", but he asks "If I go this way how do deal with it? and how do fix it if I break it?"

Despite these ridiculous questions, he asks, expects, desires for simplicity. For things to roll naturally and not to worry so much about the finer details of what really is nothing. What a hypocrite.

So which path does he take?

Of course, he sits there and looks up. Many times he looks down at his palms due to neck pain, but always returns to the sky. Be it blue, cloudy, dark; the sky is the same as looking into his palms, his mind, his heart. He is the sky, and the sky part of him.

There are times when the sky does not behave, but really they is his emotions and thoughts that do not behave.

So what next?

~~~~~~~~~

bahaha good luck =]

General Blogging

Well yesterday I was in a FABULOUS mood, so I decided to walk around Guildford since I didn't want to be home. So I walked to the many parks around here and walked straight to my forest. It isnt exactly a forest since there are houses like 50m away and pipelines next to it. But there was a decent 80-100m of space for me to roam in knee length grass and stuff. Really reminded me of cadets and camping. Except.. there was a park bench in the middle of this.

Here I sat and meditated and became enlightened. I knew the limits and the world and my world and I started to fly. No really, I ... risked the limits of my body =D ANYWHO!!! It was only the beginning. I wanted to sit on the swings but the park was taken up by 2 dogs and 2 girls.. 3 m above ground level.

SO! I walked to the place I thought I would get kidnapped. Ready to fight I beefed up and psyched myself up.. well I didn't need psyching. "Like hell I'd get kidnapped." Next thing you know I did! Jks. I got to the boring park and decided to exceed my limits and parkour. Yes.. at a park... Despite how ridiculous this sounds, it was 5ish and pretty dark. SO! I decided to do a few crazy things, forgetting consequences and ended up with a decent amount of bruises =D

Don't worry, I haven't broken anything yet, and I like bruises.. they feel good to rub don't you think? No? I like talking to myself.

Yeah, I think one day I'll learn to parkour and then do it at uni =] and die. That thought wasn't far from my mind, but it is stupid for something so small. So no point =] I got home, sweaty, wobbly [since i havent ran around like a crazy bastard in a while] and smelt fantastic [not really].

The end =]

Procrastination plan1 (success)*

Terms and condition

*I will not be responsible for your lack of actions and lack of study. You can sue me, but.. I don't have a job so DO IT! I dare you! [except.. don't read this blog in..10 years time.. I will cry if you actually do it..]

Sign

signature ~ - ~ _ ~ - ~ Name: (printed)

_________________ ____________________

Thank you come again.

Dear sister,

Dear sister,

I have no right to be in your affairs and I have no right to tell you what you should and shouldn't do, but I want you to consider how hard your own sister is working towards such a... profound future. There are not many siblings that are willing to go out on a limb to save their other siblings from making, what they think, is a huge mistake. This alone should stop you in your tracks and tell you something. Also, there aren't many teenage kids who even consider this sort of thing. Do not underestimate her words. I am not old enough to know what you are thinking nor what you may think will happen, but I can presume. I can make guesses but what I think doesn't matter.

You might be scared. I don't understand why you would be scared for. You have such an amazing sister why? As dysfunctional your family may seem, I truly believe you do not wish for another family. I would love to hear your side of the story, but I know someone who would love to hear it more than I do.

There are many paths to take, which one do you choose? The one you follow now does not seem like it is the path anyone wants to take as a child/teen. Let the sunlight in and open your eyes to the many possibility this "crummy" world has to offer. I know if something bad happens, a certain someone will blame herself for it.

~~~~~

I have discovered how much I dislike change. It makes me uncomfortable, disgusting and often sick. Despite this, I can't live without change. It is what makes us who we are, it is what brings us life and death, and it is what defines us. I can't stop this notion of change, so my answer is adapt. That is how life is designed to be. I will power through this uncomfortable feeling, learn to not become sick and become stronger. Will you move forward?

From Friend.

There I sat...

At the dinner table about to finish my dinner. My brothers have finished and left the table. And there I sat. In front of me are the two greatest men I have known... right in front of me. My dad who has been through more than I'll ever know, and my dad's dad who has been through probably more than my dad - and [probably] more hardship I will ever know...

As I finish my dinner, (I get up and start to walk to the sink with the plates and bowls I ate with), I learnt... my grandpa speaks more BS than my dad does!

He said "If you feed your wife so much... she will get fat!" I couldn't help but smile at this random comment. Then I remember how much BS my grandpa says and he says it as if he is mega serious...

The two men I most admire...

ps. I say as much BS as they do =P

happy mothers day =]

nan no tame ni? kuyashi yo. nande darou? kurushi da kedo... mou wakanai. dou de mo ii omou kamoshiran. iipon karu tsumori kedo... mou tsukareta. tsukareta noni, iku tsumori. dakara daredemo tomaranai de.

aahhhaaa. it is a crazy time of the day.. and i am blogging... 0o i am gonna really feel it later today and tmorrow.. and most likely the week.

BUT!!!

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY EVERYONE!!!

I hope oyu guys reminded how much your mum means to you, and how amazing they are =] cos IF you are reading this, it means you are a pretty alright person, and you have only your family and friends to thank for that [[but mostly family] so make sure you tell them, be it morning, arvo, or night. as long as you get it out and tell them it is all good.

you know why they make these days?? cos normality is considered boring, and boredom leads to and in closely related to nothing special. in reality we forget the small and important things, and THIS is why we have these days, to remind ourselves that we are taking for granted for somethings, and it is about time we remind the important thing how much they mean to us =]

Like in cadets.. after not showering for 5 days, a hot shower [on a 35 degree day mind] felt... AMAZING!!! now i shower 2 times almost everyday and not once have i not appriciated hot water, and water alone. i dont shower long so i am not the cause of the aussie drought ok??

~~~

stumbling on my thoughts, my tounge rolls out like a carpet to be treaded on. tripping on nothing other than my own questions, i dont even search for an answer. give up

or thought of accepting it

~~~

you ask why am i up at 3 am?? well ^^| i was reading manga until 1. cos i lost track of time... then i went to bed.. and felt really guilty that i didnt write a card for mum. [cos i normally do] so i got all comfy and what not in bed.. and after 30 seconds i got up irritated, unable to push the thought of no card] and put all my clothes back on [yes i sleep in my undies and boxes <- makes me sound like a hobo.. not cardboard boxes lah] and made an awesome card for mum =]

~~~

i have so much i want to do, but i have so much i have to do, i so little time for something that takes up so long, endless questions, zero answers.

mystery of life or is it really? (SIL)

--- for adam tokidoki kimi to yatorenwa =] <- it doesnt happen to be in the dictionary.. so i dont know you can ask a jap person LOL

alright boys and gals.. hanson is out and cold - ish.

ps. i feel like doing a sport or some physical activity till i run out of breathe and feel the pain of breathing pure fresh air, until my muscles ache for the next few days, or my brain loses the blood so everything seems so much lighter and brighter than they are. not cos i am punishing myself - that isnt punishment =] - but because it feels good, and reminds me on being a live.. stuck at a table and what not kills me..

Cos you don't need to worry about that

Well, new month new resolution! jks =P

more like [re]solution... ok no. I have possibly sorted out something that is of importance in my mind. So I guess this means there will be slight changes in my world, however, I don't expect it to happen over night or drastically change over a matter of days. <- please read that sentence carefully if you are going to read into it. I suggest you don't look into it too much, yet don't take it lightly. Cos it is sort of weighs 5 billion newtons...

~~~

"have you asked mum and dad if they want help.." psht! stupid baka yaro! my brother is such a... simple minded butt in the face sometimes. haha maybe he confuses the things I do with the things he doesn't do.

- complain corner - bom BOM BOM!!!!

Well as you don't know, my grandma is at shang hai partying at the clubs and living the high life =P and my brothers seem to be completely oblivious to the fact that 1. my grandma is getting old and she cant do everything she used to be able to 2. that my parents cant do all the chores and stuff my grandma did while she was here.

I have cleaned the house, on my own, multiple times; helped out at the warehouse more that my brothers put together [hence the huge biceps] and helped out with the chores despite being late and in a hurry.chores:vacuum the house, mop the floor, fold the clothes, put the clothes up, take the clothes down, wash the dishes *3 =P, water the plants, take the water out, put the bowls out, clean the table, set the table... that's about it.It doesn't seem much... IF I HAD NOTHING ELSE TO DO!ahou brothers. Ok they do some chores occasionally ONLY if initiate it, and do the chores as well. ri-bloody diculous.Also, the warehouse can take up half to all of the day's time. It was from 2-7, and other day 11 to 6. Useless pieces of poo. I would not feed them lols.. fix their attitudes and bloody get up earlier!! not 12pm!most of the chores are done before 12 for goodness sakes..

blah..

~~~

umm so... a heck of a lot of quizzes and studying and assignments to do. so I might just disappear for a week or 2.

自分で考えろ。そうした。そして、答えが見つけた。

yet again, I did four rights - some body help me out of the circle

It's not up to me no more, i cant decide the way my heart feels - I'm in trouble

it is a 360 turn, it's ended where we began - a heart ain't a brain.

baaabbbeeyyyeeeyy [-] you got's the music groove ?

FTLOP

For the love of poop!!!

strange huh? loving poop?? well... ok it doesn't make sense deal with it fatty.

NEXT!!!

yesterday at about 4:20 pm Michelle and I were on the main walk way steps. [The big chunky ones that stretch your ass when you walk up it?] yeah those ones... we were sitting on the steps right [the ones with grass] YES the ones that when you jump down you do somersaults and land perfectly...

we were sitting there right... and there was a couple and a friend about 20 - 30 m away... immediately when the friend left the couple started to.. you know.. get a little frisky.. Well! DO NOT be fooled this is not your ordinary couple! They can "breathe whilst sucking face" - as Michelle nicely put it.

And can I just say... they really were at it for 40mins NON STOP!!! [well most likely non-stop]

I had my eyes at the sky until something horrible like the couple were ... literally all over each other. I don't even think they were sucking each others face for most of it.. but I can tell you that their lips were ALWAYS on each other....

Scary...

FLOP the TOP in a LOP - just making words out of the title..

Well I have come to the point where there is SO MUCH work.. that I gave up =] and decided to watch tv and blog with of course satisfactory guilty.

- Shall I explain the natural order of my blogs??

ok i'll be kind and tell you. It is random to the max. I cannot maintain a lengthen amount of concentration which is reflected in this SUPER blog.

~~~~

I feel like a warrior =] battle scars. many scratches and to be scars. I had a bruise on my head =P only cos it is like F= 18kgs * 9.8 - air resistance in a container. In which momentum is conserved when the box applies an impulse force on my head and causing my head to move in the positive X direction towards the container walls. Causing my head to apply a impulse force onto the container walls due to the kinetic energy from the box.

Dont you just love how i do that? Cos i do.

~~~

Ok serious man... it is a serious problem... I dont know what to do.. someone help me

how do i say hi to a random girl??? There is a chance she is single and.. well of course I am single =] one look at a cute/pretty girl and I just am lost for words...

girls? what are your thoughts?

boys? how do you do it?

who would have known cardboard hurts?

i have never felt so... POWERFUL!!!

I shall follow suit, somethings I'd like to say to some people - and no one will ever know who. Why? Cos I won't remember.

- what are you thinking silly. Let me hear it.

- patience silly, less judgement more patience.

- Less assuming, more thinking, more talk

- I can never tell what is going in your head

- dayum! you are cute, what's your name again?

- Where are you!!

- Where are you and what is happening with you?

- Hey! What's up? or should I say what's down?

- If I was to tell you... naaah I won't say =] let you blow up your mind :L

4 hours later and my muscles are bigger than your face!!

~~~~

seems like moving boxes isn't as simple as you think it is.

hey cutie lets go ride the night away

I was thinking, maybe I have super powers.

Ok I am possibly a very light sleeper from 0hrs to 2 hrs in and 6hrs to whatever. ie. if I slept at 12, at 2 to 6 i'd be in a deep sleep. However, after those 6 hours I am a superhuman. lols more like mega light sleeper.

Everything wakes me up. From birds to construction... [normal huh?] how about an open door?

Can you ever tell when your bedroom door is open?.. ok it sounds retarded but something about pressure and crap.

Every time you open my bedroom door, the blinds move.. and mind you the blinds are no were close to the door.. ok. no one gets it.

MOVING ON

------

I don't think blogging is healthy. MEANING - I won't get any girls like this :L jks jks

~~~

what's new... I played with mega huge blocks of ice yesterday? probably20 litres of water frozen and i kicked a chunk off and started smashing/hitting the other pieces of ice.

umm. should be studying but don't know what to study.. more like don't want to study at all =P

~~~

in recovery - Has anyone watched "Pay it forward" ?? it was on last night, I recommend people to watch it. It is interesting - but you gotta start from the start. otherwise it will not do anything for you.

languages to learn

cantonese, mandorin, english, teo chow, japanese, korean

I believe that is all.

japanese shall come in handy in the future,

would like to learn korean, cos it sounds nice

cantonese same as korean, cos it sounds nice

mandorin, cos it'll come in handy for sure

teo chow cos i was born with it

english cos i have to =P

なけなるかもしらん。

big news in Hanson land.

I think I cam fighting some random dudes in my dreams. The other day I woke up with a slightly bruised knuckle and a scratch on my pinky knuckle haha.

~~~

Question: How much do we know about the past? As in how many years can carbon dating take us back? 2billion years? 200 billion years?

Question2: Is there a chance that there were humans before us? As in before dinosaurs and what not.. a 1st generation. In which they got so technologically advanced that they forgot about looking after the earth, and this caused the Earth to reset killing them and restarting. After 50 million billion years dinosaurs came to life. Is that possible?

[note: it is a question not a statement. ie. it is probably not true.]

~~~

Well long weekend, and lots to study - but can't think of them now.

Might I say, UNSW has the most spectacular view at sunset. from about 430-530, shades of various colours keep changing each minute. And despite the funky buildings, it still is very pretty. I reckon it'd be just as, if not more, pretty at dawn.

Two shots really.

^ this one was yesterday ^ this is photoshopped on phone ^ orignial

ie. limited PS. all skill ;]

~~~

This may sound arrogant, by it is true.

My world is small, but your world is smaller.

Society is a made up word, and the world is too.

Out of the two, they say the better is the taller.

Open eyes

open minds

Open arm

Open legs

insignificant actions that seem quite significant.

your WORLD is small, but this world is smaller.

The seasons are changing, and so are you.

What do you say - let's run away.

and... LOVE!

~~~~~

[ps] the last bit wasn't part of the poem.

Beautiful girls (8)

Funny, I feel like today went by really quickly but the past two days felt like they have been dragging themselves.

Well if you guys are reading my blog it must mean there is point reading. or you just care too much about my blubber, i mean blabber...

If you must know 22 hrs of physics hasn't really mad me go crazy, just more appreciative of study. Don't ask why cos I don't know either.

~~~~~~~~

Does anyone watch Pacific? If you do, you will understand how much girls mean to us boys. They portrayed the people from the times of the World War very well - from both sides, the citizens and the soldiers.

-----------

I ought to do something more productive during my breaks and times like these. You know compared to what the soldiers and the families of the World Wars, what I [mostly] and others [no one in particular] we don't really have much to complain about.

~~~~~~~~

ok I have spent 40 mins [on and off] on this page.. let me blabber

dlfjweth eosflk eheotpa

It is easy to lose track of why you are doing something - for me at least. I mean with this study stuff you forget that you are so close in using it to make a difference to the world. The real question is how much of a difference, and if you can't make a difference with your career how do you? OR are you ok with not making a mark on this world?

noma boma bom.

The sky is blue,

it comes in two.

at dusk it's night,

it's quite a sight.

now it is dark

and you say...f-shark

whilst walking the park

of course in the dark.

light blue it was,

it is now dark blue

but you dont give a toss

later the grass will have morning dew.

Then the days starts again

"Oh what a pain"

They/she/he say.

then... they will pay.

lols - my mind seemed to have stalled

as if my brain does not want to function

I feel quite... appalled

because there's a missing thought junction.

Have I lost myself over the years?

Questions I continually ask

But I must keep confronting these fears

because this is a person's task.

In poem it is harder to understand.

You must be quite bored now,

but you forget it is Hanson's land

last line, I shall take a bow. *bow*

I say oyasumi

my brain said oyasumi too long ago =]

blink open, blink... open damn you!

And the day ended how it started - With the sun in his eyes.

Before 8am, he wasn't concious.

At 8am the sun shines through the blinds and into his eyes.

At 5pm the sun shines through the blinds and into his eyes.

After 5pm, he wasn't concious.

----

Hehe I was so out of it last night I didn't realise I forgot to shower until I got into bed. Even then I couldn't be bothered to get up and shower.

----

The days seem to fade into one another night - day, night - day, night - day. day is the night and night becomes the day.

At the horizon the sun does lay.

impossible to just say hey.

Solid but not rigid like clay

It is day

what do you say?

~ tiredness. That word shan't be a word in my vocabulary, however, this is compensated with the lack of concentration.

If I had time I would do what I'd love, but without this suffering I will not learn to know what I love. Does this mean there is no time?

Questions, Questions, Questions, Questions, Questions

. . .

mate kure! iishyukan ato de modoru hazu ja...

My heart weighs in newtons, lost in your eyes - the universe

Let's get down and physical. [over rated - under marked]

At a certain point in time my heart is at its greatest potential energy, h, and what time is kinetic energy greatest. Where acceleration, due to gravity of the cavity, -0.98.

じゃ、今君は僕の心の中で何かある事知っている。

Hehe well as you can see I am going crazy of phys fever.

Symptoms - For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. For energy of conservation applies in reality, energy gained from carbohydrates and fluids, is spent on brain activity in which electrical impluses are sent to the muscles, causing mechanical movement of the limbs. As chemical and biological energy is a non-conservative force, mechanical energy is not conserved. Also, as the limbs moves, the limbs do work. The direction of the movement of the limb in the Y component means there is a gain in potential energy. However, this means potential energy from muscles and chemical bonds must have been converted to kinetic in order for the limb to move.... you get the point ;]

~~~~~~~~ Purpose?

To be honest it has been lost on the way. There is no map for the road in which I take. However, the road taken will not be one I shall regret. Majime sugi ru kana, demo iwanai to...

SO! the answer to the question above is [atm] - there is none. NANDE?!?!? Sore wa ore mo wakaranai kara kikuna.

Despite the intense physics study my mind has seem to gone the other direction to balance the.. lack of reality in my mind. Hehe SO!

R= S+F+M+E+D [where R=reality, S=study, F= food, M=mistakes, E=Exercise, D=distractions]

-(R) = I [where I is imagination]

I = P + L [where P = perfection, L = lol work it out yourself ;]

therefore. -(S + F + M) = P + L

0 = P + L + S + F +M+ E + D

However, M = E [as mistakes can be converted into exercise in Hanson's universe]

THUS!!! [moment you have been waiting for.....

O = P + L + S + F + E+ E + D

If you didn't get it... PLS FEED

~~~~ OK serious now. Was I not serious before? =]

Give me your hand, because with you I can walk, and if I can walk - I will jump, run - but it is you who will teach me to fly. Cry no more, for tears are for the weak. It was you who has taught me to defy all laws of physics, so don't cry. These are not wings I have grown, it is a resilient heart that beats and stands strong.

- besides in my awesome bright light you will never be left in the dark. My massive biceps will shade you when things are too bright, and warm you. -

There is so much out there I can see, you are the only thing I want to see.

~~~ boy oh boy this will cause a problem.

Hehe the other day MC told me to write something less boring. And it seems under pressure it isn't possible =] what does that tell ya ;] Anywho there are TWO things on my mind, and it is physics and how much - hmm don't want to scare you guys - the plastic has melted into shape.

LOL I think I need some time in a padded room. Is it that strange for a person to admit that? I would like a padded room in fact =] reckon you can stay at an insane asylum for a few hours or a day and then walk out? I would very much like that. Esp. a padded room with a boxing bag. I'd have a ball then.

~ cos it's a full time job ~

I think I prefer the physical act of writing rather than typing =]

Talk to you later.

Cos she thought the chase was the answer, when he didn't want any of it.

PS. ore wa daredemo sukijanai kara. gokaishinaide kure.

confused is an understatement, crazy is an overstatement. reality is the right answer.

Trying to get my head around this isn't the best thing for me at the moment

How pretentious it all is.